TOP 15 New Rules of Online Dating Etiquette: Psychologist Advice
Since online interaction became normal for the modern world, the possibilities of online dating have expanded. New rules were established, as well as behavioral patterns. If you’re single and eager to find a like-minded companion, our answers to the major questions of daters will help you find out more about online dating etiquette. The following rules are obligatory for anyone making the first steps on the way to a new relationship.
1. Give No Less than 3-4 Hours to Your Respondent
It does not matter how anxious you are, there’s no reason to push the communication. Give your potential respondent some time to answer, and don’t panic if you can’t start a conversation in a couple of minutes. Don’t get offended, and don’t inundate your online interlocutor with more messages if you don’t get an answer to the first one. Psychologists agree that messages like “Guess you aren’t interested in me” sound abusive and even aggressive. You get about 30% fewer chances of starting a conversation. If someone is not answering you immediately, it might happen because of the following circumstances:
- A person you fancy can be at work dealing with a tense situation. If you demonstrate your irritation concerning this matter, it makes you look selfish in the eyes of the possible partner.
- Your interlocutor might be in a company of people who should not know anything about him/her using an online dating service. It’s a reasonable solution for any reasonable person.
- Internet connection. Your interlocutor might be moving around the city or traveling from one place to another without a possibility to give immediate answers on the go.
2. Limit Yourself to 24 Hours for Responding
Both of you can be busy, but it’s highly important to keep your online relationship going in a positive spirit. Wait for no more than 24 hours to respond to someone’s online request. This rule is unspoken. Anyone going online in search of a partner should value the time of the other online users. A request not responded to within 24 hours means a person is not interested in you. If you do not give a relatively prompt answer, it means that you:
- Have no interest in this specific person;
- Haven’t got enough time for online dating due to work or other activities.
More than 90% of online singles dating tend to respond within 24 hours if they do fancy an interlocutor.
3. Use the Social Media Platforms
When you finally manage to break the ice and build a flowing conversation, get ready to socialize, and get in touch with your potential partner through social networks. Of course, not everyone agrees to get in touch with a stranger from an online dating website, but what if both of you find it convenient? As soon as you get involved in social networks, you get a chance to:
- Find out more about the details of your cultural and social background;
- Get in touch with his/her friends;
- Learn more about the interests;
- Have a look at the relevant pictures and posts.
A social network creates a neutral atmosphere where you can learn how to interact not only with your potential partner but with his/her social environment. It’s a possibility to become a part of your interlocutor’s everyday life, which will make you feel closer to each other before you first meet in real life.
4. Slow Down Before Sharing the Digits
You might be eager to have a live conversation or on the phone, but it’s not the most reasonable thing to do. Don’t share your telephone number or any private data with anyone you’ve never met in real life. If both of you are sincerely interested in each other, especially if you live in the same city or town, the best thing you can do is to arrange your first date for the initial face-to-face conversation.
- Never share contacts with anyone you’ve never met in real life;
- Feel free to insist on a real date rather than on a phone conversation;
- Don’t make anyone share personal information with you – it might cause suspicions.
5. Don’t Wait for More Than Two Weeks to Date
There’s no schedule here, especially if you live in different parts of the world. But if you live in the neighboring places or the same cities, stop texting and find an opportunity to meet with each other in one of the local cafes, bars, or anywhere you might find it comfortable.
6. Learn More About Each Other Before the Date
If you learn more about each other before booking a table at the café, you’ll feel more comfortable while talking. Make sure you’ve learned enough before getting on a date with a person you have to see for the first time. Make up a list of things you would like to know about your partner and form a list of relevant and polite questions to ask online before you pass on to your first date, eye-to-eye conversation.
7. Speak Out if You’re Are Not Interested
If you feel like your communication is not as comfortable as you would like it to be, be straightforward as much as you can do. If you feel like you need to see someone in person before you continue the communication, notify about it as early as it’s possible.
Speaking out about your preferences in the online world is easier because it’s impersonalized communication. Don’t be too shy to talk about preferences and expectations from the beginning of the interaction not to waste time on the potentially unwanted relationship. You’ll not only save your time but your interlocutor’s time as well.
8. Ghost if you need to!
There’s nothing wrong if you decide to block, report, or “unmatch” one of the dating options. It’s an honest and maximum polite way of telling someone you’re not interested. It’s normal for a matchmaking platform with thousands of users to say “no” to each other because not anyone is your match, which is normal. If someone is making you feel worried or disturbed, don’t hesitate to block the user and report him/her if you find the behavior insulting or abusive. This way you’ll protect hundreds of users from your mistakes.
9. Be Real You: Be the Best You
Regardless of how you feel like you look. Your age, gender, appearance, and hobbies become overall characteristics. They don’t characterize you as a positive or negative person. Never portray yourself in a false light and let the other people know about yourself and your vision of life so that you could find a partner as early as it’s possible.
Being yourself does not mean misbehaving or being mean just because you feel like the situation implies it. Being yourself means showing off your good qualities to compensate for the bad ones.
10. No Newsflash
Don’t ever try to send disgusting photos with you half-dressed in our bathroom. These messages are insulting to the majority of people interested in long-term relationships. If a wise person loves someone forever and ever, it’s not about the solely physical appeal – it’s about the inner emotional and psychological components as well.
11. Be Nice
Imagine yourself talking to a stranger that you might fancy face-to-face. Think about the things you would never let yourself say in real life and never let yourself pronounce them while you’re texting or talking on the phone. Remote conversations for people dating online often result in premature sarcasm and even aggression without any reasonable explanation. Make sure you lead a conversation appropriately and avoid making your interlocutor feel confused at least while you’re both online.
12. Don’t Make Far-Reaching Conclusions
Online dating is not always appropriate for the sensitive people reacting to the absence of emoji and punctuation in the messages of the interlocutor. Don’t be too judgmental and get ready for the fact that about half of the conversations will lead you to nothing. No one is obliged to become your partner just because you suppose you have something probable in common.
13. Value Your Time
Don’t let yourself keep anyone involved in an online conversation if you feel uncomfortable interacting with a person. Tell him/her that you’re “looking for a spark” and are not interested in making people get involved in a relationship with you just because you are lonely. Value your time and the time of your interlocutor as well, even if you are not fond of him/her. Go to the run. If you don’t like someone online, it does not mean that there’s no one here to replace you.
14. No Offences
When you get involved in online dating, you should understand that it’s a complicated process, and not everything will work the way you want it to. Don’t get offended if someone rejects you – it’s an online world of communication, and you do have the right to act the same. Of course, if someone insults you, you should contact the mediators of the platform to prevent the other potential victims.
15. Stay Relevant
Don’t hesitate to share another picture of yours, and never forget to discuss the crucial episodes of everyday life with your online interlocutor. Of course, it’s hard to get in touch daily, but if you’re full-fledged personalities, you’ll find no trouble interacting, sharing only relevant information about you both, and discussing common ideas to be able to build a better future together.